The presence of God in my life is a source of
strength. An even greater source of
strength is the people that I have in my life.
Those ever present, those who have come and gone, those whose lives I
touch and don’t even know it, and those who I am yet to meet. At first, I did not want people to know when
I was suffering and needed help. I felt
slightly defeated and inadequate. I
should be able to clothe myself and make dinner. It shouldn’t be difficult. I should not have to ask my husband to tie my
shoe , clasp my bra, or cut up ingredients for dinner. I shouldn’t need an arm for support during a
hike. As the time has passed since my
diagnosis, I have become unashamed of needing help. I am very open about my condition. I decided that I will not let it control
me. I will not let myself fall into
depression (although I have to admit I have had small episodes here and
there). At the same time, I listen to my
body and know to recognize when I need to take it slow or ask for
help. It can cause more damage than good
pushing through the pain. My joints are
important. My body is important. My health is important. The people in my life who are closest to me
are amazing!!!! I could not be more blessed.
They are very attentive to me and do not hesitate to help when needed,
asked for or not.
The greatest blessing, my husband. He is the one who gets the see the bad and
ugly of rheumatoid arthritis. He is the
one who has chosen to stand by my side through sickness and health. The first time he stepped in was when I was
struggling to make dinner and it made me cry. I
did not ask for it. I was pushing
through, keeping back the tears. Without
hesitation he jumped in and made me go sit down and rest. I pushed back at first, but I gave in. He is right there for me to talk to when I
get gloomy and the first one I see in the morning to tell me today is going to
be ok. He is truly the love of my life
and I am so eternally grateful for his part in it.
Through everything my parents have been there
to support me. My father and mother are
the best. They listen to me and
encourage me. My mother is a nurse, and
since I moved out of the house at age 18 she is the person I usually call for
medical advice. Without her, my life
would be dull. She fills my world with
color, light, and laughter. My father is
the first man I loved and has always been the center of my heart. He taught me about the world and literally
gave me it as well. I am always and
forever be grounded in my family. Whenever
everything in life fails, my family will not and will be there for me
always.
My family and friends keep me going. My heart beats for them as they are what fill
it with love and happiness. I keep going
for them. I keep going for God. I keep going for myself. This life is too great to sit back and
watch. I live it with them by my side to
experience all the joy, laughter, love, happiness, heartaches, tears, and
tragedy.
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